The second and final part of my interview with Nikki Whiplash, in case you missed part I then you can find it here. Enjoy :)
- Do you have a favourite piece of equipment/favourite toy?
It depends on what I’m doing I suppose, I love violet wands which is why I have got loads of them. They are wicked, so pretty and I love the smell, and you can do it in a completely dark room or electrify your finger to torture somebody with.
And you said you love canes? I used to be terrified of the cane.
That’s because they are terrifying things. It’s got to be a good cane though, not just any old cane. Canes are good! Also me and Chloe always joke we would be nothing without those wand massagers, they are just so much fun.
- What is your favourite fetish outfit to wear?
Oh I’m a leather person, I’m allergic to latex, I still wear it but sometimes it will mess up my skin. I wish I could wear more latex as it’s gorgeous.
A moment’s silence for that.
I know, I know.
- What is your favourite type of play during a session, or favourite activities?
It’s so hard, because it changes and is so subjective.
Depending on who you are with, how you feel etc?
Yes, but I do love ball busting.
I had wrestling and ball busting written down here already.
Ah, again because I’m Mrs. allergy I have to wrestle in trousers now which kind of kills some of the fun of it, you can wrestle better without them. I’m allergic to people, but luckily if you are exposed to something all the time you can become less allergic to it. So if I kept wrestling the same person over and over, I would stop being allergic to them. It’s very strange, with men in particular I just come out in what looks like nettle rash. So wrestling is off my favourites list, but ball busting is a favourite.
I also do really like really hard CP and I like mind fuckery.
(There was a definite slight evil laugh here).
I love doing really hard CP but only to someone that wants that done. I wouldn’t just go right Jess I’m strapping you down now and smashing your bum with this cane even though you don’t want it. That would do nothing for me, so I guess I’m not a true sadist. I only want to be a sadist to someone that wants to be a masochist.
It’s whatever is fun with an individual at the time, but definitely ball busting, definitely caning and teasing people and messing with their heads.
Are you into the humiliation side of things as well?
I am but it depends what form it takes. I think humiliation is quite an individual thing. Whereas if you know you’re into CP, I know how to use a cane, and I know I do a good job of it. With humiliation it takes so many different forms, so what is really humiliating for one person won’t be for another. I do like CFNM stuff when people are really embarrassed about being naked in front of me, that is brilliant fun.. There are certain forms of humiliation where I think if I don’t understand exactly what’s going to be humiliating I find it a bit tricky. I do like laughing at small cocks. It’s really disappointing when they are not incredibly small, though, then I just have to pretend they’re tiny. Maybe there needs to be a new genre: disappointingly-slightly-below-average penis humiliation?
I’m often amazed how popular that actually is with guys.
Yeah, I did a really fun session last week with that, it was a roleplay where I was a solicitor for his wife who was divorcing him for having a small cock and I had to check it was true. It was so much fun, I had to take down all the particulars and then I started working out the volume of his penis, I worked out that if you have a 5 in cock which is 5 in around, which is what he had, then you have half the volume of a 7 in cock which is 6 in around.
That’s some good maths.
Well I do have two maths A levels.
So I was humiliating him about it and that was fun, so yeah humiliation is fun. But there is a really fine line with humiliation and I think until I know somebody I can’t fully relax with it. Someone could genuinely have a hang up about something. I don’t want anyone to hate me, not truly. They can think I’m good at being a bitch, but don’t hate me, please!
- What are the best qualities you look for in a sub? Is that different between a personal sub and one that books a session?
Well they all start off as one and become the other really.
So is there something that makes them stand out?
It’s personality, it is simply their personality and if I hit it off with them. I quite like people who seem genuine. Admittedly, sometimes my judgement is really out on that but I like people who seem like they are straight up, what you see is what you get. If I feel like someone if trying to be someone else just to please me then that doesn’t really please me, even though they think it does. So being themselves and being a polite, genuine, honest person and having some integrity is also important.
- If you could give one piece of advice to a sub what would it be?
Try and have some empathy and think about how your behaviour comes across and how you would like to be treated if the roles were reversed. If they can put themselves in my position I have to let a complete stranger into my chambers, I have to be dressed in rubber or whatever, then I have to watch them do my cleaning or whatever it is they want to do. If they put themselves in my position how do you think that would feel, actually it can be a bit of a drag if the person you’ve let in isn’t nice to be around.
- What are the top 3 mistakes you find a sub makes with you?
The first one is not reading the website and asking me stupid pointless questions. That’s huge, probably 50% of my emails are things that I should never have to respond to because if they had read up in advance they would already know the answer.
Do you respond to those emails?
Depends on the mood I’m in on the day really, and how it’s worded as well. Sometimes they don’t get an answer, sometimes they get a snotty answer and other times I just explain really nicely how they should have read my website if they were serious about coming to see me.
Another mistake is lying: don’t lie! There is no point lying to me of all people. Not turning up and saying your car broke down, or your auntie’s neighbour’s dog got the runs, is so pointless – just be honest and say you bottled it, then I can help you to not bottle it next time!
Another one would be to please have a shower before you come, or ask to use the shower when you arrive, it’s just a polite thing to do and avoids you the embarrassing situation of being asked to go and wash yourself during the session. Also, if a Dominatrix offers you a mint, it’s usually for a reason!
- How do you prepare for a session or a scene to get into Domme headspace? Do you have to?
I think I’m always in it, because I’m around it all the time. I will wake up and check my emails and go on twitter and immediately be in that zone. So I don’t really need to get in the headspace. Then it’s just setting up anything I need for my session and lighting my candles and putting on my music.
Do you find what you are wearing affects it?
Yeah, hair, make up, nail varnish.
Mood lights and mood music can play a part depending on what I’m doing, but the outfit is really important.
I know some Dommes just say I’m wearing what I’m wearing today and anyone that sees me will see me in that, but I do try to tailor what I’m wearing to the sessions. I do ask people what they would like to see me wearing and if it’s something that I’m happy to wear then I will do that because I think it massively helps. If you have got a leather fetish and I’m in jeans and t shirt it’s not going to work. At the end of the day my outfit is another tool, just like having a whip or anything else, which helps get the right dynamic.
- Do you have a different approach to male/female subs? Do you see female subs?
Very occasionally, hardly ever really. The times I have mainly done things with female subs is when a guy has brought them along rather than it being the female subs coming on their own.
Do you think that’s because guys are just more likely to see a Pro Domme?
Yes, I think there is a quite unfair balance in terms of sex or kink or anything like that. If a woman walked into a bar full of men and said I want to have sex tonight who is giving me it, I don’t think the men would get upset and she would maybe or probably get what she wanted. Whereas if a man walked into a group of women at a bar and said right ladies I want to have sex tonight who is going to give me it, then he is going to get his face slapped. It’s a weird kind of imbalance. In the same way if a woman wanted to experience something kink wise she has more chance of finding it without going to see a professional.
Also the other thing is, I think women are better at fantasising, so a woman can keep something in her head and think it’s a nice idea, whereas men tend to really want to act on their fantasies. It’s kind of like a double edged sword, for men it’s maybe not as hard to say “this is what I want to do, can someone do it?”, and then have it done for them well. Women don’t necessarily feel the need to act of their urges as much. But yeah, send all the sub girls over my way, although thinking about it I would never get any work done.
When I have had couples come and you are doing something to their husband it’s a bit like “is it ok if I just do this to your husband’s penis?” Once you get started and everything is cool its fine, but the first couple of minutes I sometimes think “oh my god is she going to hit me, I just touched her husband’s cock?!”
So, do I approach it differently with a man or a women, yeah I think I do. The first thing I do if contacted by a woman wanting a session is demand she proves she is a woman. I get more fake women asking me for sessions than real women, unfortunately. So the first thing I would tell her would be to phone me, or asking for her number so I could verify her female status, it’s funny, they seem to stop emailing after you ask for a number.
That’s weird, I wonder why.
Yeah, its very strange haha.
How about with crossdressers, do you treat them differently to male subs that don’t dress?
No I don’t think I do. I have a couple who stay in character as female the whole time which is good, but I think I have learnt to be very straight up when organising for people to visit me, I’m probably quite blunt these days, old cynic really.
Actually, I think I would treat them differently if meeting in person, because I was quite nice to you at pedestal whereas I might not have been if you weren’t Jessica. Without even realising then, that is true because I was really sweet and nice to you I think, If you had been a bloke hanging around in his crusty boxers I might have told you to piss off. So I actually do.
- As a keen follower of your twitter one thing I really like (other than the stunning pics of course) is your sense of humour and how you seem to include a lot of fun into your domination, do you think the fun almost lighter side of bdsm and the inclusion of humour is important? Is it something you try to do in session?
Yes, because I’m not naturally very good at the stern angry thing, I struggle with it, I can act it for a short period of time but I find it quite draining and it isn’t really me. I can do it in a playful way but it’s hard for long periods of time. I’m more kind of take the piss and jokey and fun. I can be a real cow too, but I’m more playful than horrid. I like men and I don’t think I do a very good act of the man hater thing, I actually only want people here that I like. I find it hard to pretend not to like someone I do like or pretend to like someone I don’t like. I have done a few sessions where I have decided part way through that I don’t like the person very much and I have been genuinely horrid to them – not in an abusive way, just more that I don’t have to try hard to tell them they disgust me because they actually do, but then I finish the session with a bad feeling and I don’t want to finish with a bad feeling, I want to finish with a good feeling. So those people aren’t allowed to come back.
I think people come to me already knowing what I’m like, and if people want to be absolutely degraded and treated like total dirt then they are not going to come and see me in the first place. Even my honey badger who drinks my pints of spit and things like that, I will laugh while he does it, I’m not telling him he’s a disgusting human for drinking my foul spit, I’m more telling him “that looks yummy”, I’m more taking the piss out of him, not being truly horrible. I’m just naturally a happy person, so no point trying to pretend I’m something I’m not.
So to answer the question succinctly, Yes.
- Who would you most like to work with that you haven’t had the opportunity to do so yet, or who would you love to work with again?
Present company not included by the way.
Well obviously you, if it wasn’t you, let me think.
I have been on about doing something with Miss Sarah Jessica for so long and I have never got round to it so she is definitely someone who is on my list. I have been lucky really because I have already worked with so many cool people. The Hunteress was on my list and I have worked with her a few times now and she is so awesome, she’s on my list of people I want to work with again and again and again. I think she’s the most elegant and imaginative Domme I think I have met. She is really quick witted and creative and fun, and she is a very good actress as well, she’s like the ultimate Domme I think, she’s very cool.
I assume you will keep going back to The English Mansion as well?
Oh obviously, for as long as they’ll have me, that almost goes without saying, I just want to move in.
You and me both!
I’m sure they would have room for us both there in the dungeon or the pit, you can have the pit though.
I was filming there the other day. Filmed with Mistress T, she’s another one on my list because she’s very sharp. She is very nice, but she doesn’t suffer fools lightly so that’s quite cool. I admire she that’s she is quite cutting sometimes, she doesn’t let anyone behave like an asshole which I think it brilliant.
And I saw you did some stuff with Fetish Liza recently?
Oh yeah, she’s cool too, she is really fun. She just looks amazing, she has got the best wardrobe of anyone I have ever met – and I have seen some amazing wardrobes!
So there is always a long list of people you would like to work with?
Yes, but I’m scared to give you an actual list because when I forget someone I would feel like I insulted them, so let’s just say everyone.
- What sort of music do you like to have for session?
Depends really – I like a bit of Metallica or Marilyn Mansion if I’m doing something violent or bum fucking, something more chilled out like Portishead if it’s something like foot worship. I also like Biffy Clyro. It depends what I’m doing but I do like a bit of nasty hard rock if I’m fucking someone in the bum. If it’s going to ruin the roleplay having music then I wouldn’t have any. Music can get me in the mood, Sepultura is good if I’m being really sadistic.
I find music can really help during play, helps me get in the right frame of mind.
Yes it definitely can do, it can also ruin it though. The worst music crime incident I ever had happen to me was when I thought I had all good music on my iPod so I just put it on random, I can’t remember exactly what I was doing with my sub but The Birdie Song came on which just killed everything.
Haha moment gone!
Yes just totally gone. So yeah I do not recommend the birdy song! I didn’t even know it was on there, out of all the 10,000 songs that could have played, the fucking birdy song played at just the wrong moment.
So music can make a moment and it can kill a moment
It can totally kill a moment, yes!
- Where do you get your inspiration for sessions?
If someone gives me a background for a roleplay that they want to do then I think I have a really good imagination and I can actually believe I’m that person for the duration of that roleplay. I will fill it out and I know all my own background history and what my motivation is and how we have got to this point where I have got my employee over my knee, or whatever it is.
If subs don’t tell me a scene that they fantasise about and it literally is just a straight up Domme session then I pretty much just see how I feel at the time. If I have been given guide lines, which isn’t like a shopping list, but more like them saying I haven’t tried this before and maybe would like to try it, or equally could be “anything at all, as long as you don’t stick something up my bum”. In those cases I will pretty much play around – I don’t even know what is going to happen. So when they ask me what’s going to happen I can honestly say I haven’t got a clue, let’s find out.
- What is your favourite BDSM or Kink website/blog?
Obviously The English Mansion.
I think what I was saying about Hunteress applies to the English Mansion as well because I think Mistress Sidonia is so imaginative, where some of it comes from I can’t even think. It is so original and so good. It’s not just picking ideas out of nowhere that no one has done before just to be original, they are original but still really appealing. Yeah, I am not worthy!
When you film at places like English Mansion, do you bring your own subs?
Sometimes, it depends, I like to, but equally they have a good stable of blokes that they can use.
If you didn’t take your own sub, then you wouldn’t know who it was until you arrived?
Occasionally no, which is the only thing I ever find difficult because I usually want to have met somebody before I will film with them. The thing I don’t like about filming with people I don’t know is that I don’t know their limits beforehand and that quite a big burden, because everybody is different. People can say “you can kick me really hard” but my idea of really hard will be totally different to theirs. So I have always found that tricky which is why when I film for my own sites I will only use people I have sessioned with or met so that I can be sure, and also that way you know they are going to turn up.
With The English Mansion though, you also know that whoever they have got there is definitely going to be ok. Whereas a few of the shoots I did right at the start of my career for some of the wrestling sites were different. The very first one I did nearly put me off the whole thing before it began. This guy turned up and he smelt like a wet dog, he took me to one side and said ‘I don’t mind if you permanently ruin me, whatever you want to do, its fine with me, really fuck me up’.
In that creepy voice?
Yes. I totally freaked out and I called in the guys that were producing it and said sorry, I’m not touching him – first thing is he smells and second thing is he is really creepy. I would handle that a lot better now though, I would just tell him to get in the shower then just carry on with what I wanted to do, but at that time I wasn’t equipped to cope with that. They had to send him away and one of the guys that was meant to be working the camera had to be in the videos with me.
- If you could have one male and one female Celeb to be your sub for the day who would they be?
Decisions decisions, I’m so picky though! As soon as they started smoking cigarettes then I wouldn’t want them near me, no matter who they were! They would have to be a definitely non-smoking version of anybody.
I get the impression Simon out of Biffy Clyro would be an amazing sub.
Yeah, he looks like he could take a fair bit.
Yeah that’s what I mean, he looks like he would be fun to play with because he would probably let you really fuck him up, so I would have him.
This is going to be tricky, a woman to be a sub for me….It’s sort of saying I kind of want to hurt them, I’m always a bit funny about hurting women, I want to hurt men, I just want to look at women and admire they how pretty they are.
She could be a sub just serving you not wearing much.
Yeah, just walking round in a bikini! Oh then it would definitely be Pink, but I’m not sure I would want to Domme her because she seems pretty Domme herself, she would probably kick my arse if I tried to Domme her! Maybe she could be just my assistant or my alpha sub, above the pack.
But slightly below you.
Yeah slightly below me obviously.
- What are some of you favourite things to do away from bdsm?
I like to go to concerts and festivals, go running and like to hang out with my friends.
Just wanted to end this one with a huge thank you to Nikki Whiplash for letting me visit and interview her for the afternoon, was a lot of fun and an absolute pleasure, so thank you very much!
JD x x